Finding Serenity During Angry Times 

A serene spot

Source: Rita Watson

Despite turmoil exhibited on college campuses and television scenes of political rantings—and even my recent chaotic move—serenity slipped in unannounced. Hiding in stacks of boxes waiting to be unpacked there was a misplaced television. As such, serenity found its voice as calming music replacing TV rants and angry images.

Anger is a reaction, an emotion, that can be harmful to health. Although we cannot really control our emotions, we can control our actions and reactions.

How we disagree can significantly influence the outcome we hope to achieve. If we are looking for peaceful solutions, we want to be heard. And we want others to understand and respect our point of view.

If you want others to hear you rather than react to you, consider asking yourself these six questions:

• What feelings do I personally associate with the situation and the person or people who created this situation?
• What is it that I want someone with another point of view to hear me say?
• How can I confront without being confrontational?
• What kind of response do I want from the other person or those in control of the situation?
• In order to attain a peaceful solution, am I willing to compromise?
• Going a step further, am I willing to forgive?

Essentially you want the person or group that angered you to know how you really feel. And ideally, they will understand. When tempers are no longer flaring, and a discussion takes place, a sense of peace might prevail.

Finding peace and serenity

So important is our need for peace of mind that a multidimensional measurement tool was reported in 2014 by a team from Massachusetts General Hospital and Harvard Medical School. The term “peace” was defined as “a feeling of calm and/or freedom from struggles within self and others in a non-violent environment where hope outweighs resignation." (Zucker et al, 2014)

According to the research and writings of Redford Williams, M.D., director of the Behavioral Medicine Research Center at Duke University Medical Center:

“When we are angry at someone, we are still ultimately responsible for forgiving the other person—even if they are wrong. Refusing to forgive and holding a grudge is dangerous to our hearts and our health. Those who are angry, bitter, and determined to ‘get even’ will find that hostility is a predictor of heart attacks.” (Williams, 2012)

Immediate ways to find serenity

To remain positive, learn the value of "no." If you say “yes” when you really want to say “no” you will be angry with yourself and it will negatively affect your day. Also:

• Motivate yourself to look beyond anger.
• Refuse to engage in disinformation.
• Follow people on social media who have a positive outlook.
• Take time to meditate even if just for 15 minutes a day.

Anger and hate can seep into society

For me, despite being walled in by packing boxes and shutting out the world, I agreed to attend a young teen’s musical. Instead of a cheerful afternoon, the performance jettisoned me back to today’s political climate. The musical was Cabaret. Although many of us had seen it on Broadway, it was chilling to watch talented young people remind us of how Nazism seeped into society.

John Kandor, who wrote the score for Cabaret in 1966 with Fred Ebb, recently received the Lifetime Achievement Tony award at age 96. His words were reprinted in the playbill. He said:

“I would love for Cabaret to feel dated, unfortunately as long as people act out of hatred, Cabaret will always be pertinent...I think it’s sort of ironic. Its popularity is an indictment of the world we live in.”

Copyright 2024 Rita Watson MPH