Workplace Dynamics

When Your Subordinate Is a Hothead

Take these steps to maintain a calm workplace environment.

Updated June 22, 2023 | Reviewed by Michelle Quirk

Key points

An explosive employee can disrupt the mood of everyone in the office.
Managers should make sure to remain calm and pointed in their approach when handling an employee’s outburst.
It is important to model the way by treating everyone equitably.

Source: Moose Photos/Pexels

When I was a kid, I was often reminded that while we cannot control the actions of others, we can control how we respond to those actions. On the schoolyard, that may mean walking away from a bully or choosing a group of kinder friends. But it can be particularly challenging to maintain our cool while managing someone who is erratic and even explosive.

Hotheads are scrappers who start arguments amongst their coworkers. When they can’t figure out how to cope with pressure, they can become belligerent. They rebel by provoking quarrels among their colleagues but may not even be angry with them. You may see signs of their frustration because they have had to suppress their hostility. Further, they may be angry with you but afraid to confront you.

Instructing hotheads to stop worrying, or to relax, or that they ought to feel any given way doesn’t diminish their hostility. It would help to get them to discuss their anger, but only if they trust you and believe they can talk to you about their feelings without risking their jobs.

What you’re thinking: Joe has a short fuse. He’s an excellent worker, if only he could learn to control his temper. His actions are becoming too disruptive to put up with anymore. If I can’t get him to tone down his anger, I’ll have to let him go.

What he’s thinking: They all stop talking when I join them. They obviously don’t trust me. Well, who needs the teacher’s pets? When Sue comes in late, she gets called in for coffee with the boss. When Jerry messed up that order, he and the boss went to lunch to straighten it out. I keep plugging away, doing my work, and nobody notices me. I guess you must act up before you can get recognized around here.

Strategy

Your goal is to keep the anger of hotheads from disrupting your whole team. Help them articulate their anger and deal with it constructively so that they can become more productive.

Review your management style. Be sure you aren’t rewarding nonperformance. Involve your workers in ways that will achieve your stated goals and then reward expected performance consistently across the team. When subordinates feel they are treated unfairly, animosity can result. Establish your rules and periodically check yourself to see that you treat all your workers equitably.
Wait to discuss the problem. Don’t take a stand until your hothead employee cools down. Just talk about the anger he’s feeling. Then, when he’s able to tell you how he thinks he’s being exploited, you can shift to discussing solutions.
Work together to resolve the issue. Ask what he thinks would soothe his injured feelings. Listen carefully, without interrupting. Nod agreement whenever you honestly can. When you disagree, ask more questions.
Refuse to be a referee. When two squabbling employees each look to you to side with their case, decide whether the problem is in the system and is something you can correct. If, for instance, others are putting too much pressure on them, monitor the workflow and route complaints through your desk. If there’s a personality clash, insist they function as part of the team. Be firm in stating that you won’t tolerate interference with your standards, and warn them that if the disturbances continue, they’ll both be gone.

Tip: Sometimes you must talk tough. Usually, however, you can take a softer approach that will protect a hothead’s self-image and help him deal effectively with his hostility.