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Philosophy

11 Stoic Instructions for Living a Good Life

Don't be mean, don't fear death, and take care of yourself.

Key points

  • According to the Stoics, virtue is both necessary and sufficient for happiness.
  • Self-improvement requires growing in wisdom.
  • Real happiness cannot be lost.
Rosy/Pixabay
Source: Rosy/Pixabay

Over 2,000 years ago, the Stoic philosophers from ancient Greece and Rome postulated a reliable method for leading a good life. Their instruction: Become virtuous.

Virtue, according to them, is the perfection of human reason and rationality (logos). By developing virtues, we can not only align ourselves with what’s best in us but also live in agreement with nature (“He who lives in harmony with himself, lives in harmony with the universe,” wrote Marcus Aurelius.) This, for the Stoics, is the goal of life itself.

Humans can live in harmony with nature on multiple levels. According to William Stephens, Professor Emeritus of Philosophy at Creighton University, on the broadest level, this means to comport oneself in a way that one is not in conflict with the world—accepting events as they unfold and responding appropriately.

Next, it means living in agreement with both our animal nature (for example, by taking care of our physiological needs) and with our human nature, which is uniquely sophisticated in its intelligence (for example, by being rational and prosocial). At the fourth level, this means living in agreement with our individual nature, which includes tailoring our projects by taking into consideration our particular set of strengths, talents, and weaknesses, our specific constitution, and our circumstances.

William Stephens describes 11 simple but profound Stoic teachings on leading a good life taken from some of the greatest students of the human condition:

  1. Get to know yourself. That’s the only way to recognize and nourish your strengths and work on your weaknesses for your own good, as well as for the good of others.
  2. Minimize anger and fear. After studying anger in great detail, the Stoic philosopher Seneca concluded that the best way to deal with anger was to get rid of it from your life altogether. Anger leads to hatred and conflict with others. You can’t be in harmony with yourself—hence, happy—if you are angry. As for dealing with fear, Stoic therapy prescribes discerning what you can and cannot control. You are responsible for your beliefs, your words and deeds, your judgments about what is good or bad, and your values. What are you not responsible for? The behavior of your children (You can be a good parent, but how your children respond is up to them). The opinions of your colleagues, friends, and strangers (Be a good friend, a good neighbor, a good citizen; the rest is up to them). If you focus on the things that are up to you, then you can take satisfaction in having done your part and let go of fear.
  3. Become a collector of virtues. Dedicate your life to improving yourself. For the Stoics, that meant cultivating the virtues of wisdom, benevolence, justice, courage, temperance, generosity, and affection for others. Virtue, the Stoics believed, is both necessary and sufficient for happiness. Contrast virtue with a commodity like gold. The more gold I hoard, the less gold there is for everyone else in the world. Virtue is the only thing that doesn’t have this kind of property—acquiring more virtues doesn’t deprive anyone else of that good. Also, nothing can take away your virtues, and in pursuing your own virtues, you benefit others whose lives you touch. If you are a more just, courageous, or benevolent person, everyone who comes into contact with you benefits from your justice, courage, and kindness.
  4. Have compassion for others, Stoic-style. The Stoics showed compassion for people who did selfish, foolish, backbiting things because they believed that wrong acts were borne out of ignorance rather than malice. Thinking that others acted on their false beliefs because they simply didn’t know any better made it easier for them to understand and respond constructively to others’ misbehavior.
  5. Recognize that you are not alone. According to Stoic ethics, living a good life requires a recognition that you’re not an isolated atom disconnected from other people. You are a member of multiple layers of communities. Contributing to the common good of your communities by drawing on your strengths and talents and sharing with others what you’ve learned infuses your life with meaning.
  6. Don’t fear death. Being mortal is an inescapable part of being human. Recognizing our human limitations—that our bodies will change and that some things will become harder and eventually impossible to do—is not horrible. Aging belongs to living. If you dislike being mortal, you’re disliking being human. For the Stoics, this is irrational because that’s simply how nature made us.
  7. Self-improvement requires wisdom. Self-improvement requires growing in wisdom. Fundamentally, wisdom is knowing what’s good, what’s bad, and what’s neither good nor bad. The only thing that’s really good is virtue. All virtues are merely different applications of wisdom. For example, justice is wisdom regarding people getting what they deserve. Courage is wisdom regarding what’s to be feared and what’s not to be feared.
  8. Real happiness cannot be lost. Happiness is a psychological state. It’s not something you’ll read on your bank account. Often, people attribute happiness to external factors—wealth, fame, and other popular notions of success. All these things are impermanent. For the Stoics, real happiness cannot be lost. If you cultivate virtues and become a good person, you will respect yourself. That’s a kind of well-being that transcends any conditional happiness that involves factors beyond your control.
  9. Don’t be mean. For the Stoics, what’s to be feared is not death, not disease, not poverty, not pain. Instead, what’s to be avoided at all costs is wickedness, malevolence, injustice, and violence. The good news is that each of us individually can choose whether we practice malevolence or kindness day after day.
  10. Be a good student. If your goal is self-improvement, the Stoics recommend giving yourself daily report cards. Assess what you did well and what you did poorly. Recognize your mistakes and commit to doing better tomorrow. Stoics believed in being strict with yourself but kind to others. Remember that people make mistakes out of ignorance—they don’t know any better. Similarly, when you make a mistake, think of yourself as a student. You’re learning. You will stumble. You’re always trying to do better. Measure your progress against your own past mistakes, and don’t beat yourself up.
  11. Take care of yourself. If you neglect yourself, then you’re ignoring your own talents and making it impossible for you to contribute to the greater good and achieve a meaningful life. Self-care is not selfish. Self-love is not abandoning your true needs. You have a responsibility towards yourself to care for your body, mind, and heart.

Many thanks to William Stephens for his time and insights. Dr. Stephens is Professor Emeritus of Philosophy at Creighton University and the author of numerous books.

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