Shattering the Illusion of Invincibility in Black Women

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The song “I’m Not Your Superwoman” by Karyn White, though released in the 1980s, still provides a framework for challenging the commonly celebrated notion of “resilience” in Black women. It also highlights important concerns about the burdens placed on Black women by societal expectations. The expectation of resilience can lead to an excessive emotional and psychological burden. Black women are frequently expected to shoulder not only their own struggles but also those of their families and communities, often without adequate support. The pressure to be resilient can have detrimental effects on their physical and mental health. Chronic stress and the need to constantly appear strong can contribute to higher rates of mental health issues such as depression as well as health-related problems (i.e., hypertension), among Black women.

Black women’s experiences are diverse and cannot be encapsulated by a single narrative of resilience. It is essential to recognize the individuality of our struggles and successes, rather than homogenizing our experiences under the banner of "resilience." Dr. E, a Black woman, shares her story below as an example of how resilience can sometimes divert our attention from vulnerability, struggles, and the need for mental health support.

Dr. E’s Struggle with Mental Health, as an African American Woman

During my doctoral studies, I was completely immersed in both classes and lab work. These characteristics are not uncommon for persons in both my field of work as well as other similar areas of study. The issue for me was that I was so occupied with my Ph.D. that there was little to no room for a social life; interaction with friends, or items outside of this goal. I transitioned to increasing my standing and becoming a recognized engineer within my corporation with little to no interest in relationships.

This was the definition of ambition and normality to me until a relative came to visit about five years into my industry tenure. She was a psychologist and she and a friend mentioned that I should be evaluated for depression. Instead of following her advice, I was angered by her suggestions. The anger was manifested by my ego; after all, how could someone like me be mentally ill?

I worked in another country four years into my career. Upon returning, I experienced a speech impairment and vertigo. Two to three years later I discovered that I had Multiple Sclerosis (MS) for many years as well. As a part of MS, some individuals can suffer from depression, which is what happened to me. My relative was right in her diagnosis of my mental health symptoms, but my pride interfered and I suffered instead of listening to and following sound advice. Although I cannot transfer what happened to me to other Black women, in my personal experience I was told to, “suck it up” and to “get over myself” which contributed to my decision not to receive comprehensive support.

I am on medication now and although it has helped immensely, there are days when I feel like crawling in bed and cowering in a blanket. Before medication, I was my worst enemy, (i.e., no amount of work was good enough or another task needed to be achieved). This was rapidly curtailed by a major MS episode that left me paralyzed from the neck down for one month. As a part of my physical recovery, I was given an anti-depressant that played a part in my rehabilitation. Several years passed and my MS went into remission although I still have symptoms of depression that are treated by medication and a therapist.

I am the "poster child" for depression. For example, I used to travel for work and one time, I accidentally left my anti-depressant in the hotel. Within a day or two, I became agitated and anxious, which affected co-worker interactions, and completing job tasks was nearly impossible. I also gained weight due to my depression which caused other medical conditions and ultimately, I had to retire this year.

Black women need to take our mental health seriously. Your mental health is just as important as your physical well-being. For many years, I suffered unnecessarily from my symptoms of depression. I considered it as a sign of weakness or a personal failure, which discouraged me from seeking help. Now, I have options for managing my depression and I am no longer encapsulated by the "strong Black woman" stereotype.

The "Resilience of Black Women" Is a Myth

Dr. E's narrative is a good reminder that education and support alone do not offset the effects of mental illness. It is also why Black women's mental health needs to be redefined. True resilience should not be about enduring hardship without complaint. It should encompass the ability to seek help, to rest, and to practice self-care. Redefining resilience in this way allows for a more sustainable and healthy approach to dealing with adversity. Embracing vulnerability and acknowledging the toll of constant resilience can lead to healthier and more authentic expressions of strength. It’s important to create spaces where Black women can express their struggles without the pressure to appear resilient or feel overburdened.

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The notion that resilience is a myth in Black women serves as a critical reminder to examine the pressures and expectations placed on them. While resilience is undoubtedly a remarkable trait, it should not be romanticized to the point where it overshadows the need for systemic change and personal support. A more balanced approach recognizes the strength of Black women while also advocating for their right to vulnerability, rest, and comprehensive support.

The trope of the "strong Black woman" can serve as a double-edged sword. While it acknowledges strength, it often imposes an unrealistic expectation for Black women to be perpetually resilient and disregard their need for support and vulnerability. Addressing these challenges requires a multifaceted approach that includes increasing awareness, improving access to culturally competent care, implementing supportive policies, and fostering community-based solutions. By tackling these barriers, we can work towards mental health equity and ensure that Black women seeking and receiving mental health support are normalized and encouraged.