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Underneath the Sheets

A thoughtful look at sex, sexuality, and misconceptions about them

Sex
Why Couples Avoid Sex

Diane Gleim LMFT, CST, CST-S on May 11, 2023

As a sex therapist, it is common in my work to see couples who are not having sex. The reasons can be varied and unique to the couple. Here's why.

As a sex therapist, it is common in my work to see couples who are not having sex. The reasons can be varied and unique to the couple. Here's why.

Sex
When You Want Your Partner To Want Sex

Diane Gleim LMFT, CST, CST-S on March 17, 2023

When you want your partner to want to have sex, there's a tricky balance between encouraging them to find their own motivation and not pressuring them.

When you want your partner to want to have sex, there's a tricky balance between encouraging them to find their own motivation and not pressuring them.

Persuasion
How an Argument About Body Hair Helped a Marriage

Diane Gleim LMFT, CST, CST-S on December 13, 2022

My clients came to session that day needing to talk about body hair, an emotional and contentious topic for them. Here's how we found a solution that worked for both of them.

My clients came to session that day needing to talk about body hair, an emotional and contentious topic for them. Here's how we found a solution that worked for both of them.

Sex
How to Communicate About Sex During Sex

Diane Gleim LMFT, CST, CST-S on October 25, 2022

Communicating during sex can feel awkward for many people. Yet it is an important sexual relationship skill to build. Read on for this sex therapist's suggestions.

Communicating during sex can feel awkward for many people. Yet it is an important sexual relationship skill to build. Read on for this sex therapist's suggestions.

Sex
When Sex Research and Sex Therapy Clash

Diane Gleim LMFT, CST, CST-S on June 29, 2022

You're curious if researchers have studied a question you have about sex. But maybe you should pause a moment before you consult Google.

You're curious if researchers have studied a question you have about sex. But maybe you should pause a moment before you consult Google.

Sex
Do Erotic Interests Help Explain Sexuality?

Diane Gleim LMFT, CST, CST-S on April 15, 2022

Personal Perspective: An erotic interest is different from an erotic identity. It's perfectly acceptable to have something be an erotic interest and not an identity.

Personal Perspective: An erotic interest is different from an erotic identity. It's perfectly acceptable to have something be an erotic interest and not an identity.

Sex
The Myth of "Sexual Incompatibility"

Diane Gleim LMFT, CST, CST-S on June 25, 2021

The phrase "sexual incompatibility" comes with certain unexamined assumptions and implications. But it doesn't have to be so anxiety-producing.

The phrase "sexual incompatibility" comes with certain unexamined assumptions and implications. But it doesn't have to be so anxiety-producing.

Sex
Here We Go Again: Sex Addiction Is in the News

Diane Gleim LMFT, CST, CST-S on March 31, 2021

"Sex addiction" is a provocative subject. But since it is not an established diagnosis, we need to look deeper at what else may be going on. Read on to learn more.

"Sex addiction" is a provocative subject. But since it is not an established diagnosis, we need to look deeper at what else may be going on. Read on to learn more.

Sex
Pope Francis, Sex, and Pleasure

Diane Gleim LMFT, CST, CST-S on September 18, 2020

Did you see the news last week? Pope Francis made a sex-positive statement about sex and pleasure. Here are this sex therapist's thoughts about it.

Did you see the news last week? Pope Francis made a sex-positive statement about sex and pleasure. Here are this sex therapist's thoughts about it.